125 Plant Puns That Will Make You Bloom With Laughter

Plants are one of those household accessories that either bring you joy or dread. It has taken me several tries, but I’ve managed to keep a few houseplants alive. Which, if you know the struggle, is no easy feat. No matter your plant experience, these scenarios are perfect for plant puns and jokes.

Puns are a great way to brighten anyone’s day. There are nearly 400,000 plant species, so there’s plenty of “fertile” ground for big laughs. Whether they’re indoor or outdoor, plants are fundamentally functional, but also very majestic. Think about it, some grow fruit and are large, while others are small with vibrant colors. Despite their unique characteristics, plants are awesome for the environment and pretty powerful for humans, animals and the earth.

It also makes me laugh a bit when I hear about people who talk to their plants. After all, they are living things, so maybe they need a pep talk. Better yet, why not tell them one of these puns or jokes to help them grow?! They do have feelings.

Ready for more plant-themed humor? If you're a newbie or practically a horticulturist, you’ll appreciate this humor. So, let's dig in! Whether you share these funny jokes with your gardening friends or just want a few giggles in between your digging, this list of 125 plant puns and jokes can hit the spot.

Related: We're Not Eggs-actly Mocking-Birds, But These 101 Bird Puns Will Make You Quack Up

Best Plant Puns

1. You grow, girl!
2. That’s plant-tastic.
3. Don’t kale my vibe.
4. What in carnation is going on here?
5. I’m rooting for you.

6. Aloe there! Is it me you're looking for?
7. Plant one on me.
8. I'm so excited to see you, I could wet my plants!
9. I'm a grow-it-all.
10. Thistle be the best day ever!

11. Take your thyme.
12. Let me in-tree-duce myself.
13. We make a great pear.
14. Don’t be a prick, be a cactus!
15. We’re mint to be.
16. This is so mulch fun!

17. Don't moss around.
18. You can grow your own way.
19. Good chives only.
20. Who are you rooting for?
21. You're simply radishing.
22. Succ it up!
23. I believe in you—you’re unbe-leaf-able!

24. Have a fan-cactus day!
25. Hey, how’s it growing?
26. We’re best buds forever.
27. I’m vine with whatever.
28. What up, succa.
29. There’s no one I'd rather grow old with.
30. Stop orchid-ing around.
31. Say aloe to my little friend.
32. Sorry, I can’t. I have plants this weekend. 

33. Lettuce celebrate!
34. I'm so lucky to have a fern like you.
35. I will survive.
36. I beg your garden?
37. Take it or leaf it.
38. I'm blooming with joy!
39. You make my heart skip a beet.
40. I’m so glad I pricked you.
41. Let’s stick together like succulents.
42. My love for you is unbeleafable.
43. You’re my best frond.
44. Thanks for not leafing me.
45. I’m so glad you rose to the occasion.
46. I’m rooting for us.
47. You’re such a fungi to be around.
48. Welcome to a day in the leaf of my plant friends.
49. Do you want to have a little fern later?
50. I hope your day doesn’t suc.

Funny Plant Puns

51. You're unbeleafable!
52. Have you botany plants lately?
53. I'm very frond of you.
54. Put the petal to the metal.
55. Stop leafing me out of the fun!
56. I’m sorry for the moss-understanding.
57. You had me at aloe.
58. Fern-get about it!
59. Ain’t nobody got thyme for that!
60. Don't moss this up.
61. What a re-leaf!
62. You’re berry special.
63. I wet my plants.
64. I'm feeling vine.
65. Everybody romaine calm.
66. Chive got a lot of love for you.
67. Orange you glad we made this list of plant puns?
68. I hope your day is fan-flower-tastic.
69. Peas be mine.
70. Baby (Tears) got back.
71. Time to turnip the volume.
72. Oopsie daisy
73. Bee-leaf in yourself.
74. I’ll be there for yew.
75. Do you want to be in a lawn-distance relationship?
76. My heart beets for you.
77. Just dill with it.
78. Time to turnip the beet!
79. Don’t be a stick in the mud.
80. Yew and me make a great pair.
81. You’re pretty fly for a cacti!
82. The grass is always greener where you water it.
83. I’ll never leaf you.
84. I’m rooting for you every step of the way.
85. Don’t be so a-freud of being yourself.
86. You’re such a spud-tacular friend.
87. Don’t take me for planted.
88. If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.
89. You’re mint to be amazing.
90. We should aloe-ver get together.

Funny Jokes About Plants

91. Why was the gardener so good at his job? Because he was always on his toes!
92. What part of a flower has the most friends? The bud.
93. What tree will fit in your hand? A palm tree.
94. What do you call a plant that steals your money? A rob-bush!
95. How do trees get on Facebook? They log in.
96. Why is everyone dancing? Because the farmer dropped a beet.
97. What do you call a grumpy garden? A crabgrass patch.
98. What’s the fiercest type of flower? A dandelion.
99. Why do trees hate tests? Because they always get stumped.
100. Why was the leaf always invited to parties? It was always raking in the fun!
101. What does a cactus say to its date? “I’m stuck on you.”
102. What did the flower say after it told a joke? "I’m just pollen your leg."
103. What’s the scariest plant? Bam-boo.
104. Why was the plant always happy? Because it had a lot of chlorofun.
105. How does a gardener fix their jeans? With a pumpkin patch!
106. What do you call a lazy herb? A slow thyme.
107. What’s a nervous tree called? A sweaty palm.
108. Why don’t trees make good detectives? They always bark up the wrong tree.
109. What did the big flower say to the little flower? “Hey, bud!”
110. Why did the gardener plant a light bulb? He wanted to grow a power plant!
111. How do you know when a plant is sad? It leaves.
112. What’s the saddest plant? A weeping widow.
113. Why do plants go to therapy? To get to the root of their problems.
114. What’s a tree’s least favorite month? Sep-timber.
115. Why did the flower break up with the soil? It was tired of being dumped on.
116. How do trees get ready for a party? They spruce up.
117. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
118. How does a plant answer the phone? Aloe?
119. How do roses kiss? They plant one on the other’s cheek.
120. What do you call a talkative tree? A babbling birch.
121. How does a tree go home? It leaves.
122. What’s a plant’s favorite genre of music? Heavy petal.
123. Why don’t roses ever drive? They always get stuck in a jam.
124. What plant is always cold? A chili.
125. Why did the mushroom go to the party alone? Because he was a fungi.

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